Bye, Bye fear!

In the spirit of this spooky day, I thought i’d talk about fears. Not the type of fears you’re thinking like Micheal Myers stalking babysitters with his white mask, the creepy clown who drags kids into sewers or my personal biggest fear of a big fish with sharp teeth terrorizing a boat full of vacationers. Yes I know it’s not some demonized clown but sharks are really scary!! I’m talking about real fears. Fears of what can realistically happen. Well, let’s hope Micheal Myers isn’t actually real!

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself” -Franklin Roosevelt

We all have different fears. Some fear being unsuccessful in life, some fear heights, some fear poverty, some fear the unknown. Fear is the killer of all things. People fear other religions, which causes hate and war. People fear love and being hurt, which causes loneliness and self isolation. People fear change, which causes wasted time or not moving forward. People fear different ethnicity’s, which causes racism and non unity. There’s so much that fear ruins. I used to think I was fearless, i’m sure most of us did when we were younger. I use to do stupid things without thinking of consequences like walking around downtown at  three in the morning, not thinking anything could happen to me. Waste all my pay cheques on clothes and shoes. not thinking about saving any of it for the future. Went on dates with boys without being a little more cautious of knowing them a bit better first. Many things were done without fear and yes looking back on those situation fear probably would’ve been a good thing, making me a little more prepared. The fear we need to dispel is the fear that stops us from living an amazing life like fear of vulnerability, fear of change, fear of the next step, fear of a broken heart. I am thirty three now, had a great career of being a hair stylist for 13 years but I never wanted to be in that industry for the rest of my life. The fear of not finding something else I loved stopped me from taking the chance of retiring for about two years now. I ripped the band aid finally and let me tell you there’s still fear about what to do next. I still have no clue but that can be exciting! I used to also be so afraid of love, not wanting to get hurt again, which kept me single for about six years and it was good in some ways but ultimately I was lonely. We might avoid certain situations because we fear the outcome but what kind of life is that?! You could waste so much time in your life worrying, being stressed or upset just because of fear. Fear can make positive situations seem like negative ones and who wants that?! Fear can stop you from a much better life or incredible experiences. We wouldn’t let people stop us from doing what we want, so why would we let fear halt us. Besides, who want’s to be a scaredy cat?!

Wikipedia defines fear as: “A feeling induced by perceived danger that occurs in certain types of organisms which causes a change in behaviour. Fear may occur in response to a specific stimulus occurring in the present or in anticipation or expectation of a future threat perceived as a risk to life”.

Even the definition is unsettling… ‘change in behaviour’, ‘perceived danger’, ‘threat’, ‘risk’… Personally I would never want something to negatively change my behaviour. I do not want things to be perceived as negative when they really can be positive and risk should be a good thing! Taking a risk to change a career, taking a risk to travel the world, taking a risk moving to another country. Those are the types of risks I like. All in all fear to me has a one word definition, stunt! Stunting is the prevention of growth and that’s pretty much what fear does. Fear prevents us from taking chances and chances are what life is all about. Growth is what life is all about! What a boring life we’d have if we never took any chances. Chances on love, chances on discovering a new country you probably would never travel to, even taking chances with people all because you are afraid. There are many people I ‘perceived’ as probably not being the best person to be around and then getting to know them they turned out to be wonderful human beings. We don’t want to let anything stop of us from being our authentic selves especially the fear of the outcomes. One of the things I’ve always thought of myself is being a strong woman, in a good way! Strength overcomes fear, so we want to look fear in the eyes and let it go! We should all grow in life and not stay stunted because we’re afraid, that is definitely not the definition of strength. So on this day of all hallows eve, let’s be afraid of ghosts and goblins and not of things that can prevent our growth as a human being! Let’s not be afraid of the outcomes but embrace them! Let us all say goodbye to our unnecessary fears and be risk takers!! Stay strong and fearless everyone!!

Peace, Love & let’s be courageous xoxo